Three weeks to go ...

So I didn't win that competition - missed it by 7 votes. Not the end of the world though because I have the most brilliant woman doing my make-up for me :)

Yes people of blog world, I'm now going to punt my make up artist (that means I'm going to ADVERTISE her, not kick her).

We did a trial on 4 September and she did such a brilliant job. So it is with much relief that after the last nightmare I had I know I can rest assured that I have got a fantastic make up artist to make me look like a model. I can't wait to be all dressed up with the hair all fancy and the face all done up. Not done up to the point where I'd look like a drag queen mind you. No no. Done up to look like a princess.

Now I don't think she has a web page up yet, but you can contact her on her email address: ulrikebester@telkomsa.net or via her Facebook page. Trust me, she is very good at what she does and worth every penny.

Ok, so now an update on other wedding info.

I woke up on Thursday morning in one of those "OMG I need to make a list" moments. And since I didn't have pen and paper next to the bed, I grabbed my Blackberry and started making a list of things I need to do. Needless to say, this list is as long as my arm! Thank the heavens above I wasn't "blessed" with arms like an orangutan! So I have now started working on that list and many things have now been marked as "in progress" ... lets just hope I can move them on soon to "completed"!

You know something though? I don't remember there being so many legalities the first time I did this. You have to have fingerprints taken these days. Fingerprints! WTF! I'm so glad our marriage official told us to come see him a few days before the big day to get that messy business out the way. Can you imagine that crap getting on my dress!!! The horror! And and and! That's not all. You need three ID pics ... each. Whoever is signing as witnesses (that will be my dad and H2B's mother - a.k.a MOG [mother of groom ... keep up people!]), we have to have a copy of their ID's as well as ours. That's just to name a few things that our marriage official needs for all the paperwork to be processed.

So today I met with the head of the Wonder Woman squad and we had breakfast - so nice to be able to spend time with my BFF and catch up! (Love you hunny!) After that we went off to Candles 2 Hire here in Somerset West to go figure out what we need to hire for decor purposes. No, don't panic! I've got it all together! Just had to get this final detail done! Anyway, we met with Barnie van Vuuren, owner of Candles 2 Hire. He was very helpful and will be sending me a quotation in the next day or so - hopefully with a rather grand discount too. No pun intended there by the way. If this all pans out the way I'm seeing it in my head then its going to look amazing. Definitely going to need to get together with my MC who will be handling arrangements for me on the day and get the details sorted.

After that my H2B and I went off to Cape Garden Centre and Atlantic Pebbles in Joostenburgvlakte to get a few things that we needed for the decor, etc. What a lovely place! The kids would so love it! Can't afford to take them there at the moment ... and might not for some time while I pay back the debt I'm incurring! LOL! I'm so glad we went there today - we got things done and it was a good relaxing time.

Next on the orangutan list of things to do .... well, lets see .... *grabs Blackberry* ... sorting out shoes for my daughters (1 x flower girl; 1 x bridesmaid) and my son (1 x bear ringer - I'll explain that one in a bit). Get my son his suit "a-la-bond style" (he also asked for a water pistol that looks like a "real gun" so he can really look like Bond and maybe shoot some people .... SO not going to happen). I need to go to the venue and sort out the food and drink story - I think this will probably be done a week before though just to make sure the numbers are final. We need to finalize music choices for certain times during the evening. We need to see the marriage official. I need to go fetch the jewelry before 16th. I need to go fetch the flowers for the bouquets and those little lapel thingies that the groom and other bridal party/family have to wear ... never know what to call those ... because, YES! I'm doing the bouquets and lapel thingies myself. Not a damn am I paying over R400 for a bunch of flowers that I could put together myself for about R200! Daylight robbery I tell you! I have to find a small blackboard with a nice frame around it - about A4 size (if anyone knows where I'll find that let me know PLEASE). And then there's a few other things too which by mentioning would make this post as long as a full grown orangutan's arms.

So, lots to do, lots to do.

Thank GOD I've got people who are making an effort to help :)

My head Wonder Woman is going to be taking off the day before the wedding to help me fetch things and get things in order. The rest of the Wonder Woman team will be coming to join us later on and staying over. The night before is going to be great.

OH LORD! I still have to go buy some sexy undies for later on the big day .... because what I AM wearing under the dress is not going to inspire greatness in my H2B at all. And no, you will not be seeing a photo of THAT! Getting into a stomach-tucking-bum-lifting-thigh-smoothing undergarment is a laugh to say the least. I can't do it on my own either. No. I need help pulling it over my ass cheeks. And yes. It's hysterical and bound to bring forth great mirth to my ladies in waiting. Oh and by the way - any woman who is not a stick insect and about to fall through her own ass, who tells you that what they have on under their wedding dress is "sexy" is LYING to you! Trust me. She will be wearing something very unflattering to the "naked" eye to make the final picture look dreamy. And then, when the time comes for the newly weds to leave and go show each other their freak flags (you know you have one ... you may not know how to fly it yet ... but you have one), the bride will slip away and strip off the false advertising she has adorned and slip on something gorgeous and ready to be torn off. Ah the joys of being newly wed. Can't wait! ........ Thank GOD he knows what he's in for!

I did promise earlier to explain the "bear ringer" statement. When the kids found out that we were going to be tying the knot, they got all excited and through the bouncing up and down in the kitchen were shouting out what they wanted to be for the day.

• Danielle: "Mommy mommy! Can I be a bridesmaid?!"
• Raechel: "I want to be the flower girl! I want to be the flower girl! Can I? Can I can I ????"
• Ethan: "I can be the BEAR RINGER!!!!!!

So yes, my ring bearer will hence forth be my bear ringer. Don't tease him about it though. He bites and can be a cranky cub - but his mama bear will take your head off if you do. ;)

The other day my little flower girl asked me very seriously if I was going to be wearing heels under my dress. Bless her soul, to her I'm not a short pygmy. When I confirmed that I was the answer was something along the lines of: "But you'll mess up the petals I need to throw" ....

.... crap .... one more thing to add to the list .... *hauls out Blackberry* ... get petals for flower girl to "sprinkle on the floor as I walk in front of you mommy" (said with dreamy grin).

OK ... I'm off to bed ... don't wake me early ... I'll be very displeased with your actions which will bring about great pain and discomfort to you.

xxx

Nice surprise

This week hasn't been a good one so far ... I've been rather snowed under at work trying to get a whole host of things done. It gets a little stressful to say the least.

Something did however make my day today.

I received an email from Wedding Connexions to say that I was a finalist in their Cape Town Bride Make Up Competition. I entered this on Facebook on the Wedding Planning group page. Basically I'm one of five finalists and I stand the chance of winning my wedding day make up for free from Powder Puff Make Up! What a great surprise!

So now, its time to vote for me. You have to become a fan of their group on Facebook to be able to vote. Once you're a fan, you can click here and then click on my picture and click on "like" to vote. If you're not of Facebook and would still like to vote, leave me a message and I'll send you the email address to mail your vote to.

The voting closes tomorrow evening at 10pm.

I'll let you all know how it goes ...
xxx

ooooooooooooooo SHINY!!!

I went to spend some time with the lady who is going to be making my tiara (yes I'm going all princess for the big day), earrings and bracelet. Her name is Kathleen Barry and she owns Kathleen's Bead Studio in Claremont (check out her website, blog and Facebook page).

If you're planning an outfit for any occasion and need some appropriate jewelry to go with it, Kathleen is the perfect person to go see for something unique. I took swatches of the material that is being used to make my dress, the bridesmaids dresses and the flower girl dress. We matched up the right colour Swarovski crystals to the material and decided on which design for earrings etc would work. It's going to look amazing!!! Can't wait to see the final product and then enjoy wearing it on the day.

Now I'll probably only ever wear that tiara once, but its not a waste of money because Kathleen (in her brilliance) has suggested that when I'm ready to do it I should bring the tiara in to her and we'll use the crystals to make other jewelry that I'll be able to wear more often. Clever. Very clever.

I'll post a picture of what it looks like when I get it from her. I should be picking up all the goodies by 15 October. Just in time for our hair trial with Rachel at Carlton Hair on 16 October :)

Everything is coming together and I'm literally counting down the days to walking down the aisle and becoming Mrs H2B!

What I will be doing shortly is putting a list together of all the service providers I'm going to be using to make this day exceptional. I'm sure this may come in handy for anyone else there who may be thinking along the same lines as I am :)

Chat soon!
xxx

Comic relief

Changes again....

So apparently a change is as good as a holiday ... so I'm going to see if the change to this blog will grow on me or not ...

So much to do, so little time....

It's the final count down! Today in five weeks time my H2B and I will officially be Mr and Mrs Allen. We'll be on the road trip made in heaven ... off on our honeymoon .... so exciting ... 34 days too far away right now! I am desperate for a holiday! Need some time out away from reality and the busyness of my life.

I get this panicky feeling when I start thinking how little time I have left to sort things out. I know I had another dream the other night too ... but for the life of me can't remember what that one was all about. I do know it was wedding day related. I had another dream after that which was work related and that's the one I do remember. It has been rather hectic at work, so I don't get much sleep when I am perplexed about things.

But enough bitching and whining .... look at this:
hahahahahaha! I've been browsing through these online comics and this one is called "Get Fuzzy". You'd have to go read it from the first one because some of them follow on from the last ones. Funny funny funny! I've been loving it. Laughing so much the tears where flowing and my H2B was getting slightly irritated. Nah, he wasn't actually, but I'm sure if I had carried on it would have ended badly! LOL!

Go check it out and let me know what you think!

xxx

Decisions and Choices

While at work today I was contacted by an old friend via Skype with whom I haven't spoken in quite some time. It was lovely to hear from her again. It also made me realise how far I've come over the last 3 years of my life. *Reminisce Reminisce*

My journey (for those of you who don't know already) is something that has been blogged about on this site for some time - feel free to do some catch up and go read about it if you want to. I'm not going to recap on everything now. Needless to say, it has been an incredible journey of self-discovery and growth. I've learnt so much and continue to do so each day. I have an amazing man in my life who I love and adore and who literally treats me like a queen. A great job. A roof over my head, food on the table, a sexy beast of a vehicle and three gorgeous children who I adore. There is almost nothing I could add to my life right now to make it better.

One of my favorite quotations whilst on this journey has to be by the author Anias Nin:

"Then the time came when the risk it took
To remain tight in a bud was more painful
Than the risk it took to blossom."

I love that quote ... it says so much of how I was feeling when I made some life altering decisions for myself. Decisions that would affect everyone around me. Decisions that would take people out of my life. Decisions that would ultimately cut me off from a life I had been leading. Yet it would be a decision that would make me spread my wings.

How liberating. The freedom that comes with a decision that more often than not 90% of people around you would see as sheer madness. Yet, you go ahead anyway. Because in your heart of hearts, in that place where you keep all your deepest and perhaps darkest secrets - the place you tend to hide the real you ... or the parts of yourself no-one wants to see because it might "offend" by not fitting the mold. In that place deep inside your heart and soul, you know its the right thing to do. And not just for you, but for everyone else involved too.

Those decisions are never easy to make either. They force you out of your comfort zone at a speed that could leave you dizzy and nauseous. And they're not decisions that should be made during a fleeting or heated moment either. They require much thought and deliberation. Less emotional energy and more clear thinking. Often much planning needs to be made too ... "get your ducks in a row" as the old saying goes. Making a rushed decision has never ended well. Even risks need to be thought about well before being embarked on.

Having the courage to delve deeply into your own life, heart, soul ... where ever you AND the angels fear to tread ... having the courage to do that is a major accomplishment. It means not lying to yourself and being brutally honest about what you see in there. It means acknowledging your faults and weaknesses and having the courage and strength to change them by any means possible. Of course that means making some hard and conscious decisions that will often take you on a path that is very uncomfortable. But at the end of the day, its about where you want to end up. Your finish line. Your goal post. You decide what type of person you really want to be. You decide where you want to end up one day. You decide what legacy you want to leave behind.

And what is that decision going to be? "OMG I can't make that choice now because it will be too hard" .. ??? ... oh come on! That's not the right attitude to have. You always have a choice in everything you do. Either you're going to be strong, and yes, sometimes hard on yourself, and make the choice to be different. Or you're going to continue to be in the void that is your life. You are the master of your own destiny. The author of your own story. How do you want it to read? What do you want to be remembered for? What do you want your children to learn from you?

And yes, I've heard a lot of excuses from people who have spoken to me about similar big decisions. "Its easy to speak about it, but not so easy to do it Meegyn". No shit Sherlock. Go on and grow a pair ... I had to and I survived. And if I can do that, if I can make a very hard and difficult decision and carry it through, then so can you. You're the only one standing in your way.

It goes without saying that having a support structure around you is helpful. I had people in my life that I though were a support structure. They turned out to be a judgemental bunch of hypocrites. I did, however, have another group that consisted of great friends and family, who have been my strength and have stood up for me when no one else would. Friends who were not always in agreement with my decision, but stood by me anyway because they love me no matter what. Its nice to have real friends in my life. And although it was hard, I'm grateful that through this journey I have discovered who my true friends really are. (You guys know who you are ... and I thank you for all your love and support and want to tell you that without it I wouldn't have made it ... I love you all more than I could ever possibly put into words!)

I'm happy and content with where my life is at right now. I began a journey that I'm sure will not be over for a long time, but certain points of that journey have been passed. They're behind me now and I've driven on. And as with any journey, we focus on what we see before us ... the road ahead ... through the windscreen. Because if we constantly stare in the rear view mirror we'll end up missing a turn and most definitely crashing the vehicle. By all means, take a look in that rear view mirror ... just to make sure you've got nothing coming up behind you to bite you in the arse. But don't focus on that. Focus on your end goal. Focus on where you're going.

Remember too that you never have to travel alone ... there will always be a willing passenger that will keep you company or even help you drive when you're exhausted and can't anymore. Just make sure that person is someone you can trust behind your wheel and not some psycho axe murderer.

Life is hard. Decisions and choices are hard. You CAN do it though. Don't give up!

xxx
Me